Abortion

Lately everyone seems either pro life or against those that are pro lifers. I feel all too often both sides miss the point. Let us look at some aspects of this huge and emotion stirring issue together.

The questions I want to ask in this article are:

–          When is something alive?

–          Isn’t it my choice?

–          How to help (someone who has undergone an abortion and someone who might decide against one).

When is something alive?

I believe we can agree that when looking at life from a biological view we need to look at it within its environment and ecosystem. A fish will not survive outside the water…neither will a dog survive under water (to simplify the meaning). Looking at human life, most people argue that life is established when a child is born and some will add, or when it can be sustained to live outside the womb. If I ask, “When is it alive?” those mentioned might be the answers. But ask yourself “what about the day before? And the day before that?” and you will find that the boundaries are fluent. However no one can argue that there was a once off incident that caused this life – namely conception. Looking at it further, I want to leave this question with you: “defining life on an embryo outside the womb is like defining a fish’s life outside the water – thus quite inaccurate. Is an embryo therefore alive or just a lump of tissue?

Isn’t it my choice?

The primary argument for any abortion is that of the mother’s choice to decide what she does with her body. And I DO agree… she has a choice and always should have a choice! I’d like to challenge you to look at the time when she makes a/the choice.

To support my point, let us look at a metaphor: If I had a deadly poisonous snake with me and an antidote and I’d come up to you asking and saying: “The bite of this snake is deadly…it kills every time, unless you get the antidote. In that case if you are not allergic to the antidote it saves your life with a 98% chance. If however you have a stomach bug, flu, or you eat something still today that might make you sick the chances of it saving your life sink to 89%. Now the facts stated… would you allow it to bite you here right on the spot?” Most people would say “no” right?

Well…now let us look at the choices again. I truly and deeply believe that every person alive should have a choice: The choice WHEN to have sex. Sex in its biological sense is for reproduction (and yes…we all love the fun that comes with it and I agree it should at all times be fun too!), i.e. when having sex the biological implication is a pregnancy. Having the antidote to the consequence – namely a condom, a pill,… , doesn’t change that fact a bit it only eases our conscience. The choice to have sex, should ALWAYS be that of the participants (and I am not going to go into details on when you should have sex or not, as that fact should be clear to every Christian and will change no argument with a non-Christian). Once that choice is made however… the consequence is that of the participants as well. i.e. if you get pregnant, you are pregnant…don’t argue it is your choice still. Think about it and be honest with yourself. If you get into a car drunk and cause an accident, no judge will let you go on terms of the argument that you didn’t choose to get into the accident. He will simply say that it was your choice to drive in a drunken state of mind.

How to help

I believe all too often people being pro life stand demonstrating in front of abortion clinics affecting little other but causing offence, hurt, and soothing their conscience. I would like to propose another approach to Christians being pro life:

Try this… build an outside flat to your place. Let the flat come with all it needs. Then stand by the clinics with a sign reading something like: “no matter what you choose, let’s talk about your future and find a way together”. When they then approach you (be it before or after an abortion), talk with them… but primarily listen. Then invite them to stay with you for the next 1,5 years in that outside flat free of charge. Let them sign to a few basic rules of living with you, and allow them to be part of your family. If they decided not to abort, by that time the child will most probably be a year old and many of the challenges they were afraid to face alone become manageable by the offer you make to them. If they aborted, it gives them time to heal.

Either way: A woman that considers/or undergoes abortion needs most of all emotional help. She is hurting, afraid, challenged beyond her abilities. Allow her to get close…allow her to witness your own family life with God. Do not preach to her, but let her witness and become part of the healing and change that only GOD can bring forth. Do not judge her, but decide to love her, like Jesus.

I believe if every pro lifer would do that ONCE in their life time and would stop demonstrating in front of clinics, we could change the attitude of a nation and be within the will of God.

God bless you and keep you!

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2 responses to “Abortion

  1. I agree with you, just two points:
    – many of the pro-lifers standing outside the clinics are not just demonstrating, they are actually approaching the women going to the clinics and offering their help in various ways (taking them to pregnancy crisis centers, explaining what an abortion really is, offering to pray for them, offering counselling, etc). Many women have changed their minds thanks to those people standing there. I think we must be careful not to assume those pro-lifers are just there to soothe their consciences.
    – The other thing is, building a flat outside your place and furnishing it is a great idea, but not everyone can do it, either for lack of space, or for lack of finances or time. We can’t go and challenge everyone to build a flat and be fully responsible for a single mom for more than a year. It’s a huge responsibility for one person / family to take. I think it is something that should be organized by churches. Different people have different gifts and can therefore offer help in different ways. One person can help financially, but not necessarily offer the time / emotional support required. Another can help with caring for the baby, while another is gifted with counselling. Not everybody can do all those things alone.
    Just my thoughts. Maybe others have other ideas.

  2. I agree Barbara. And I am not intending to send the message that ALL pro-lifers are there just demonstrating. I am just suggesting that many still are…and that some even are there to soothe their conscience. So all I am doing is challenging every one to review their own honest standing on the matter. Building a flat is not for everyone – I am sure. But some definitely could…but which ever way it feels… most will find the proximity to be something they consider uncomfortable, for then people would see their true self. The way they behave behind the safety of walls. i.e. they’d truly have to behave Christian and thus BE Christian even in situations no one
    would have seen before. 🙂

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